Throughout our child and adult lives we all come to crossroads in life where we need to make decisions. Some of these decisions are life altering others are smaller decisions, but they still impact your life no less. After reflecting on this past year and also on the first few days of this new one, I am wondering if these were just bad lapses of judgment or if they were really some higher up saying that I need to make the mistake in order to learn from it.
I am a firm believer in all things fate in that things always happen for a reason. Such as the car in front of you going slow as hell, which forces you to drive slow which probably prevented you getting into an accident if you were going faster or saving you a ticket from your speeding ways. I always feel the universe has a sense of balancing itself, and that's the little ways it makes it happen. One of my favorite quotes in the world is by Aldoux Huxley when he said "Experience is not what happens to you, but rather what you do with what happens to you."
Since dating and relationships are all part of life and is a significant part of life, these people are all considered those experiences and what you do with them. I mean throughout my many dates I've been on throughout my years I always look back on them and discover something about myself. Seriously I could unravel all of my meaningful relationships and extract specific traits and qualities that each of them contained that I wish I could wrap up in a little box and tie it with a bow. However, maybe discovering these extractions have become my pitfall.
Instead of seeing people for exactly who they are, flaws, quality traits and all of the in betweens, I've realized that when dating someone I have developed this super sonar quality of honing in on everything annoying, irritating, frustrating and inconceiveably awful trait that person has. I'm beginning to wonder where I developed this own awful trait of seeing people in such a narrow scope. Sometimes I feel like on dates I'm just frantically searching for something bad in someone rather than glowing in their amazing qualities. Is this a fear of moving forward and onward? Or am I afraid that if I find a truly good man then I won't be able to continue this awesome blog? :)
Anyways, I think I'm off topic now. Regardless, we all make decisions where we wake up the next morning and smack ourselves on the forehead and say "What the HELL was I thinking?!" Maybe we weren't thinking is the key, not the problem. Sometimes things happen that we do look back and cringe about, but at the same time realize that we probably needed to make that mistake just to prove to ourselves that it was a mistake. Does that make sense? Maybe. I think it's that proverbial anecdote when your parents tell you "Don't touch the stove, it's hot." And just to prove it, we touch the stove anyways and more often than not have a nice little burn on our hand to prove it. I think relationships with people work along the same parallels. We're always told by our mommas and daddies not to date bad boys, or don't date a guy that will disrespect you, yadda yadda. Yet we ALL date those types of guys. I used to think it was just to disobey my parents, but looking back at things I think it was simply the fact that I needed to do it, get burned and walk away scarred, but at least I'm walking away knowing I won't need to go there again. Instead of looking at my hand for the scar this time, all I need to do is look in my heart.
I am a firm believer in all things fate in that things always happen for a reason. Such as the car in front of you going slow as hell, which forces you to drive slow which probably prevented you getting into an accident if you were going faster or saving you a ticket from your speeding ways. I always feel the universe has a sense of balancing itself, and that's the little ways it makes it happen. One of my favorite quotes in the world is by Aldoux Huxley when he said "Experience is not what happens to you, but rather what you do with what happens to you."
Since dating and relationships are all part of life and is a significant part of life, these people are all considered those experiences and what you do with them. I mean throughout my many dates I've been on throughout my years I always look back on them and discover something about myself. Seriously I could unravel all of my meaningful relationships and extract specific traits and qualities that each of them contained that I wish I could wrap up in a little box and tie it with a bow. However, maybe discovering these extractions have become my pitfall.
Instead of seeing people for exactly who they are, flaws, quality traits and all of the in betweens, I've realized that when dating someone I have developed this super sonar quality of honing in on everything annoying, irritating, frustrating and inconceiveably awful trait that person has. I'm beginning to wonder where I developed this own awful trait of seeing people in such a narrow scope. Sometimes I feel like on dates I'm just frantically searching for something bad in someone rather than glowing in their amazing qualities. Is this a fear of moving forward and onward? Or am I afraid that if I find a truly good man then I won't be able to continue this awesome blog? :)
Anyways, I think I'm off topic now. Regardless, we all make decisions where we wake up the next morning and smack ourselves on the forehead and say "What the HELL was I thinking?!" Maybe we weren't thinking is the key, not the problem. Sometimes things happen that we do look back and cringe about, but at the same time realize that we probably needed to make that mistake just to prove to ourselves that it was a mistake. Does that make sense? Maybe. I think it's that proverbial anecdote when your parents tell you "Don't touch the stove, it's hot." And just to prove it, we touch the stove anyways and more often than not have a nice little burn on our hand to prove it. I think relationships with people work along the same parallels. We're always told by our mommas and daddies not to date bad boys, or don't date a guy that will disrespect you, yadda yadda. Yet we ALL date those types of guys. I used to think it was just to disobey my parents, but looking back at things I think it was simply the fact that I needed to do it, get burned and walk away scarred, but at least I'm walking away knowing I won't need to go there again. Instead of looking at my hand for the scar this time, all I need to do is look in my heart.
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